Loss
by Emalynne-Blackwell
Summary: Deidara greives over Sasori's loss. He gets a new partner right away anyway, and turns his pain towards Tobi. Tobi wants to help his new Senpai but will Deidara let him in? Character Death, Past SasoDei, TobiDei/DeiTobi, Shounen-Ai/Soft Yaoi.
1. Prologue: First Strike

Deidara's yell filled the air as the swords pierced his heart. Itachi attached himself onto the blonde's waist and attempted to hang onto the now hysteric Deidara. Sasori coughed blood off in the distance and fell to his knees. They were quite a ways away but Deidara could see, through his scope, the two swords, held onto by the puppets of his own parents protruded from his only human piece left, his heart. Sasori's eyes were wide and Deidara could have sworn they looked at him as Sasori's lips moved slightly before he fell to the ground. All sound seemed to have ceased as the blond stopped for a moment before he thrashed more violently against Itachi's grasp. Tears continued to flow from Deidara's eyes as the pink haired girl and the old woman relaxed and exchanged pleased glances. Deidara yelled at them, even though the rational part of him knew they couldn't hear him.

Konan's blue hair filled his vision as she took his hands and whispered words. "He's gone Deidara, we have to go back. There will be people coming soon. We have to go." She continued whispering words to him as she held onto his shaking hands but he couldn't hear her though because he couldn't see anything except his fallen Danna. All was quiet in Deidara's mind as he looked at his Sasori's now lifeless eyes, looking but not seeing, and swore he saw a tear fall from his eye.

It all came crashing down in an instant and the sound returned as the two who killed Sasori left his field of vision. Deidara inhaled a long needed breath he didn't know he needed. He was losing energy but managed to yell his loudest yet at Sasori. "You said art was eternal! You can't leave me! Damn it Sasori! Don't do this to me! You can't die! Art is eternal, remember! You are supposed to be eternal, Danna!" He continued to yell as tears spilled down his cheeks rendering his death threats meant for the two who had murdered his Danna and for Itachi for holding him back, into sobs and moans.

Deidara collapsed to his knees sobbing and shaking uncontrollably. Itachi let go but stayed near and on guard and on guard seeing as they could be found at any moment. Deidara hadn't exactly been subtle and seeing as they were all wanted criminals, being found would be quite a nuisance. Konan knelt down in front of the distressed blond and pulled him in for a hug, all the while whispering reassuring words that he didn't really hear as he continued to stare at the lifeless shell that had held his Danna. It hurt to think he would never hold Sasori again, or that those strong arms would never protect him again.

Konan was glad when Deidara stopped yelling and answered her hug, wrapping his arms around her waist as she held him tighter and stoked his blond hair. She knew what it was like to lose someone that important to you, and knowing there was nothing she could say, she just held him.


	2. Leaning away from you

Loss – Chapter One

It was the soft knocking that let him know he didn't have to move. Had it been anyone else, any other knock, he would have thrown the bombs that he had lined up along his headboard. He had only been bothered a few times by other people, but not lately. They had learned to stay away after getting wounded by explosives. After three knocks, the door creaked open and let soft footsteps enter the room and pad towards his disheveled bed. Deidara could hear soft murmuring coming from just outside his door and figured they were talking about him He wouldn't yell at them though, because he didn't want to frighten the only person he didn't mind seeing. The bed sank down where Konan sat, and she waited for the blond to stir.

He was half covered by a thin white sheet leaving his bare torso visible, but his hair and his arm hid his grief stricken face. Deidara slowly wiped dry tear stains off his cheeks before sitting up and looking at the woman on his bed. Konan did not smile at him or offer reassuring words, she just handed him a bowl of soup as she had for so many days and took his silent thanks. He began to sip it softly waiting for her to get up and leave with last night's plate, as she always did, but she made no move. Deidara didn't mind this time. Normally he wanted everyone to just leave him alone, but Konan cared about him, so he couldn't hate her for being around.

The sheets rustled as Konan got up and walked around behind him to look at the giant knot that had formed in his hair from the unkempt ponytail. She sat down behind him and gently pulled the elastic out and untangled it with her fingers. He looked back at her with sad eyes that said how much he really didn't care about his hair right now. She took the half empty bowl from his hands and set it down on the bedside table. She wrapped her hand around his head and the other around his waist as she had six days ago and pulled him against her into an embrace. She stroked his hair as his hands balled up in her cloak as he tried not to cry. "It's alright." She rested her cheek on the top of his head and closed her eyes as his breath came out ragged and chocked with sobs as she felt her own tears threaten to slip down her cheeks. Konan murmured soft words that were meant to be reassuring. Her own voice was trembling and she wasn't even sure who the words were meant for, Deidara, or herself. Deidara couldn't understand her words as they were muffled by his hair and his sobs but he felt reassured anyway. He knew this was weakness and that it was stupid to still be acting like such a child over something so trivial, but every breath that passed his lips still tore at his heart. He had given up on trying to cope a few days ago and instead just rested his head on Konan's shoulder and let his heart beat itself apart. She smelt like lilies and soup.

Deidara eventually ran out of tears and pushed himself away from her. She looked at her hands, empty now, and felt so useless again. He reached his hand out towards the side table and frowned when his arm wasn't quite long enough to reach the table. Konan smiled and stood up. She handed the bowl to the blond and sat down in front of him again. He resumed sipping quietly but looked up at her when he heard Konan sigh. She was looking at him with sad eyes that probably mirrored his own. She waited until he finished and handed her the turned to lie down and pulled the sheet up, when she placed the bowl on his bedside table again and spoke softly, "Deidara…" He looked at her again and she almost couldn't say it but she knew if it wasn't her, it would have to be someone else. The last thing she wanted for the blond was for him to have to hear the news from someone like Hidan or Zetsu. "Pein has a new partner for you and he will be moving in shortly..."

"No." Deidara's voice was rough from lack of use and added to the spite in the single word he spoke.

"Pein wants you out there. There aren't enough of us for you to…"

"Akasuna No Sasori is my partner." He looked away as he spoke, his voice catching slightly as he spoke the name. "I don't need any other partner." Konan figured this would be hard on the blond, but she had never figured it would be this hard on her.

"Deidara…"

"You don't know my Danna." His eyes were pained and glinted with anger as he looked at her. "No one else can be my partner if I already have a partner and my partner is Sasori No Danna…"

"Sasori's dead Deidara! He's gone and you know as well as I do that nothing is eternal! Not even Sasori!" This was her family. It was more painful to say it than she imagined the words dug deep into her heart. She could only imagine what her frustrated words had just done to the blond. Deidara hung his head. His hair covered his eyes but tears dripped off his face. "I'm sorry Deidara, I…"

"I know…" He sniffled and wiped tears away from his eyes before looking back at her with an almost sick smile on his face. "I guess I was right after all." He looked away again smile faltering and his voice dropping low. "Art is fleeting… because Danna was art." His eyes were distant when Konan stood up and took the dishes and walked over to the door.

"Your new partner should be here shortly. It might help if you were up." She waited until he looked at her and nodded then she left him alone. Deidara sat in silence for a moment before walking over to Sasori's neat bed and began to collect all his favorite puppets and supplies and moving them all over to his own bed all the while apologizing under his breath. He didn't want this new partner to have his way with any of Sasori's things.

He showered and put his hair up routinely before dressing and lying back on his bed to gaze over at where Sasori used to sleep. He remembered a lot of things about this room. This was his and Sasori's room. His mind wandered back to what it must have been like for Sasori when he was partnered with Orochimaru. Deidara figured that the bed he was laying on must have been Orochimaru's. Had it been hard on Sasori when it had been his partner that betrayed them and left? Had Sasori lied on his bed and looked over at the empty space across the room? Had he felt as much hartred for Deidara as Deidara now felt for his own new partner? He couldn't help but smile to himself knowing that there's no way that Sasori and Orochimaru would have done what they had. That Orochimaru would never have seen those sides of Sasori. Or had he? How had Sasori felt? His mind wandered to questions that he would no longer be able to get the answer to as he fell asleep, leaning against the wall.

~~~

Deidara opened his eyes lazily to be confronted by a giant orange lollipop. "That's a relief! I thought you were dead!" The voice was too happy and going to be annoying. He grabbed a piece of clay out of his pocket. "I'm Tobi! Leader-Sama said you're Deidara and I'm gonna be your new partner!"

"Katsu." A small explosion flew out of the blonds hand and exploded right in front of the masked ninja's face making him jump back. It wasn't big enough to cause damage as they normally did but just enough to startle the new arrival. "You bother me and I'll make an explosion big enough to throw you back out of here where you belong, yeah."

Tobi had landed on his backside and looked up at his new partner with wide eyes that the blond couldn't see; Deidara cocked an eyebrow when he didn't move. The blond jumped when Tobi sat up on his knees suddenly and spoke again, not quite excited but still quite childish.

"Deidara- Senpai…" He was starting something…

"I'm not your Senpai…" Tobi sat for a moment looking at the blond. Deidara's face expressed his anger and frustration, but Tobi spoke up anyway in a lowered tone.

"Senpai is overdone anyway. Can I call you Deidara No Danna?" Deidara's breath caught in his throat, and he swore the mask was hiding malice as the voice sounded beyond cheerful, almost cruel.

"Absolutly not! I'm not Danna!" Deidara made sure to clear his thoughts of his late redheaded partner so he wouldn't show weakness in front of Tobi at their first meeting. Not that Deidara was ever going to show his pain in front of this idiot! There's no way anyone could replace Sasori, especially not some happy-go-lucky lollipop.

"Alright!" Deidara looked back at his 'new partner', not even knowing he had looked away, and frowned. "Deidara-Senpai it is then! I still think Deidara No Danna sounds better…" Deidara already had the large C2 explosive in his hand and it only took a moment to toss it at the bull's-eye shaped mask in front of him.

"Katsu…"


End file.
